Hilarious Satire: Fighting Smokers Our Taxing Duty

Hilarious Satire: Fighting Smokers Our Taxing Duty

An excellent satire from New Zealand:

We, Tariana Turia, Tribune of the People, duly and legally elected by a small proportion of a small proportion of those same people, do hereby pronounce and proclaim, we are appalled.

And with the power vested in us as Associate Minister of Health for the realm of Aotearoa New Zealand, a position attained through political expedience rather than by any perception of merit, we shall act.

Our subjects may recall that in the Year of our Lord 2011 we issued the “Wag That Finger and Say Tut-tut” edict, the purpose of which was to shame and vilify smokers, thereby propelling one in five of the adult population of the realm, more people indeed than voted for the Labour Party at the last election, out of the moral mainstream and onto the distant shoals of ostracism where they belong. And we are pleased to report that the campaign has proved popular with those who know what’s good for others.

Citizens, we commend you.

We also commend, and invite to morning tea, those members of the Auckland Council who voted to ban smoking in public places. They had the courage to act for the public good, even though the scientific evidence indicates that one has as much chance of being damaged by a whiff of someone else’s tobacco smoke in a public park as one has of being converted to Mormonism by a glimpse of Mitt Romney in a blond wig and suspenders.

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